Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Stealth Smackdowns Give Illusion of Perfection

Amber and I were joking last week that since we don’t often write anything negative about our husbands perhaps we should have one day a week where we blog about their misgivings. Alright, so maybe that won’t happen, but it sure would be great blog fodder, wouldn’t it? Of course, if I know my husband, and I do, he’d be soon setting up his own blog to happily report on my lack of perfection. And, since I am almost perfect, I’d like to keep up the charade a little longer. ;)

At any rate, I find that people often wonder why my spouse, and I don’t fight that much. Well, gentlefolk, we do. (You can pick your jaw up off the floor now). In fact, we can argue ‘til the sun comes up. The thing is we choose to be mature about it (most of the time). I try to make sure stay out of earshot of the kids when having an *clearing throat* heated debate because I don’t want them to feel bad for daddy because I always win. Oh, and I don’t think it’s anybody else’s business, so I keep most of it to myself. Think about it, if we have a big ‘ole smackdown in the presence of friends or family, the company present is either going to feel forced to choose sides or will just be embarrassed by our behavior. So, why not just avoid all that drama. I’d hate to see my husband lose all his friends and family support to me. It’s bound to happen.

Honestly though, all couples bicker. If you don’t, go get yourself a trophy and shout from the rooftops because you are one in a million. I’ve seen those couples who don’t argue and they are the couples who often split up. Alright, so not all split and most just end up with some deep-seated issues. At least that’s my humble assessment. Come on, that can’t be healthy. It’s got to come out sooner or later—better in the dining room before a makeup romp than in the courtroom before a final judgment dividing someone’s retirement. :)

I promise I can be serious. Bear with me.

I know that the there is a time and place for certain things. We have some friends who are quite a pair. Recently, I witnessed them in a group setting hashing it out. Apparently, this is commonplace with them. Okay, so that’s their thing. They are the party-fighters. Me, I’d rather bottle it all up for the ride home and let him really have it. ;) Damn, there goes my stoicism again.

Point, point, where the heck is my point?

With each year of marriage and accrued service year, I’ve learned politics and diplomacy. Maybe our way of addressing points of contention has to do with this military life. Perhaps it has to do with keeping up a certain image :) . Whatever the reason, I think that I’m most fascinated with people who think my spouse and I have a perfect relationship. *chuckles* I think if that were the case I would be one bored lady.


Amber said...

*gasp* Me?! I said I could have something negative to write about my husband? Surely you must be mistaken...

Good post! :D

The Roaming Bilderbacks said...

here, here!
It really irks me when people say, "Oh you guys are so perfect, you never fight." No, we just don't have screaming matches in public.